Things To Do On Saturday (or “Why I Am Such A Good Boy”)

These events took place over the course of one weekend when Bitey had just turned four months old.  This was before  I had a camera, and it took me pages and pages to scribble out all of the misery my puppy put me through in those two days!

I'll save you!
I’ll save you!
This soap would be easier to grip if it had grooves...
This soap would be easier to grip if it had grooves…
This shower curtain should be longer.
This shower curtain should be longer.
You could save some money on kibble if you let me eat from here!
You could save some money on kibble if you let me eat from here!
But I like coffee.  Honest!
But I like coffee. Honest!
Buttons are too dressy!  A  pullover would do just fine.
Buttons are too dressy! A pullover would do just fine.
Aww...don't give this sweater away to charity.  I like it!
Aww…don’t give this sweater away to charity. I like it!
Good Boy Sweater 2

I'll tear out this page in Grandpap's catalog so he knows just what to get me.
I’ll tear out this page in Grandpap’s catalog so he knows just what to get me.
I'll save some money by eating my yard yark.
I’ll save some money by eating my yard yark.
What?  I just wanted to read it!
What? I just wanted to read it!
Redecorating is fun!
Redecorating is fun!
Mommy's shoe needs breaking in.
Mommy’s shoe needs breaking in.
I'll put this where Mommy can find it easily!
I’ll put this where Mommy can find it easily!
This rug would go better in the middle of the room.
This rug would go better in the middle of the room.
I'll test and make sure this coffee table leg is strong!
I’ll test and make sure this coffee table leg is strong!
A tired Mommy is a good Mommy!
A tired Mommy is a good Mommy!

Toy of the Gods

TP Roll

Mommy forgot to shut

The bathroom door

Where the roll of TP

Hangs so close to the floor.

TP Joy
TP - Copy

When from over my shoulder

Comes a loud, angry roar,

“Don’t touch that, you beast!

I don’t have any more!”

So I snatch up the end

And away I do soar..

So pleased with my game,

I am thrilled to the core!

TP Mummy - Copy (2)

Leaping and bounding

And twisting with glee

I watch as my human

Can’t catch up with me.

I roll till I’m wrapped

like an ancient mummy.

It’s a gift from the gods

This roll of TP!

TP No

TP Mummy - Copy

Walking in Deep Snow (or “My Little Problem Solver”)

Snow Saga 1 - Copy

A few years ago, we had a surprise snowstorm drop nearly 30″ on us overnight.  The snow fell so evenly that at first I didn’t realize how deep it was.  When I tried to step outside to walk the puppy in the morning, I fell…but what made me laugh was that although I fell, I didn’t fall down.  I was stuck in snow so deep that all I did was flop forward slightly at the waist.

Snow Saga 1 - 2

Geordie, on the other paw, did not fare as well.   Although he had to “go”, he was so unnerved by the deep snow that he wanted to go back inside right away.

I love to go exploring after a snowstorm, and today was no exception.  Getting around proved to be quite a challenge, though.   I didn’t have snowshoes, just boots, so wherever I stepped, I sank deeply into the snow.  Geordie was just heavy enough to fall through the crust and flounder in the silky powder beneath.

Snow Saga 3

To take a step, I would have to raise my lead leg as high as I could, extend it as far as it could go, then lean forward (kind of like goose-stepping).  Once my weight shifted, I would end up with my trailing leg extended straight  behind me, resting on the snow.  I had been doing this for a while, and couldn’t believe how exhausted I was.  I must be more out of shape than I realized!  Until I chanced a glance back to see how the puppy was doing.  This is what I found:

Snow Saga 5 - Copy

Through all my clothes, I couldn’t feel him standing on me.