Thamnophis Brachystoma

It says here the snake will emit a foul odor from its anal glands if you try to pick it up. It farts? I knew I loved these things!

I don’t know if this is the same snake that was the garden earlier this year or a different one. Either way, this one is about 3x larger than the first. I was able to find it because Toby tried to stick it up his nose.

This was the baby that came to visit in the spring.

Snake and dead toad

Geordie was petrified of snakes and wouldn’t go near them. At least I didn’t have to worry about him being bitten.

Real Life Me is a badass.

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Handknit man's cardigan.

Looking for a gift for someone special? Cooler weather is right around the corner. Consider giving that special person in your life a hand knit tweed cardigan. Available in a variety of colors and sizes, all are made with love. And coconut shell buttons.

Cardigans are available from my shop.

Black Pearls

What the heck, Toby. You must have swallowed one of my hairs. It's like a string of black pearls back here. This wouldn't happen if you didnt eat off the floor.
This wouldn't happen if you ran the vacuum more often!

But Toby, you hate the vacuum!

Back end of Cairn terrier sticks out from under the bed.

I know….

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Visit my shop to see the new collection of men’s hand knit cardigans and pullovers. Each one is knit with care of unbelievably soft merino merino/alpaca/tweed yarns. There are a variety of colors and sizes available.

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Come with my boys as they visit the museum of their dreams in Dream Our World.

Cover of the book Dream Our World

This is an incredibly fun book enjoyed by readers of all ages. Inside Geordie and Toby view the world of art from a canine perspective while enjoying a day of unsupervised fun.

Dream Our World is available from my store and from Amazon.

Fast & Furious

Hey look! There's a FAst and Furious marathon on this weekend!
Is that some sort of Vin Diesel crack? No, I really like the intricate plot twists and witty dialogue.
Wisper. Whisper.
I mean, i like the cars. The cars are cool. Well OK.

Just kidding. I have a little more hair than that.

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To see more of the mischief my boys have been up to, pick up a copy of Dream Our World. So far, the boys have been running around the local museum for nine months. I can’t imagine what they have been up to while we humans have been locked out.

Cover of the book Dream Our World

Dream Our World is available from my shop and from Amazon.

Baldilocks

Recently, Alyssa Milano’s ghost (it had to be her ghost, right? I mean if you catch covid, you automatically die) put out a YouTube video showing her hair falling out in clumps after she had contracted the virus.

Ew, my hair is falling out in clumps! Is it mange? I bet it's mange. But Rapunzel, how will we now climb your tower?

My hair has been falling out by the handful since late last summer. Turns out, hair loss is not a side effect of the virus but of trauma. It could be an emotional or physical injury, but it is natural for hair to stop growing and fall out for several months after an extremely stressful incident.

It looks like my Homicidal Boots have found out yet another way to haunt me. Not only did they make my knees swell up and compound my neck injury (the Bell’s Palsy might be in part because of the head trauma I experienced) they have now made me nearly bald.

Pair of boots sitting on grass.

A friend made me laugh. She said that she had no idea about my hair loss – that my hair always looked so full when she saw pictures of me. The only pictures anyone sees of me are the ones I draw, so yes, I have Disney hair!

Cover of the book Dream Our World

To see more of my emotionally supportive pups’ adventures, pick up a copy of Dream Our World. Inside the boys visit the museum of their dreams and view the world of art from a canine perspective. Really, it is a seriously cute book.

Dream Our World is available from my shop and from Amazon.

Further Down the Rabbit Hole

Now the doctor thinks I might have Bell's Palsy on top of everything. Oh gosh, I think I just peed myself! Sanctuary! Sanctuary!

Yes, while my head was still grotesquely swollen from bee stings, I woke up to my right eye drooping half-way down my face like a stroke victim.

Young cairn terrier looking over his shoulder.

Seriously, you’re not going to make me walk with her in public, are you?

At my follow up eye appointment I had to discuss with the doctor whether or not I had had a stroke. That’s always fun. The doctor suggested my condition might be Bell’s Palsy. I had disregarded that thought initially because the symptoms weren’t constant. I guess they don’t have to be.

Hey guys, I'll be trying my new sleep goggles tonight. By the way,could someone help me to bed?

My mom took pity on me and my homemade eye aids and got me a pair of sleep goggles. They are supposed to create a seal to protect your eyes from air and to lock in moisture. Unfortunately I am not a adult-sized human so they are too large to fit inside of my orbital bones, and they gap. They do block out the light nicely.

Both Bell’s Palsy and logopthalmos (sleeping with your eyes open) have to do with damage to a nerve. Out of curiosity I googled whether chiropractics might help Bell’s Palsy, and the answer was yes. The doctor said that Bell’s Palsy usually only lasts a year or two, but if I could shorten that, I would be happy. Happy enough to cry? We’ll see. (Ha ha)

Toby doesn’t care about my eye situation – unless I step on him when they covered. He prefers to concentrate on his “Sexy Parties”. (Note how one of Toby’s may female admirers is giving him a kiss at this get together.)

Puppy Party!

Toby is the only boy on our walks, and he loves the attention of so many ladies.

Cairn terrier stalking prey

More stories about me, and less about your crap!

Cover of the book Dream Our World

For more of Geordie and Toby’s stories, pick up a copy of Dream Our World. Inside, the two boys visit the museum of their dreams and enjoy a day of unsupervised fun!

Dream Our World is available from my shop and from Amazon.

Qap

What happened? I got stung by a bee. Yikes. You sure can't cover that with a mask. Aagh! Call Patrick Stewart! The Klingons are coming!

I’ve been getting a lot of “Third Eye” comments lately too.

Young cairn terrier looking over his shoulder.

Don’t try to kid yourself. You always look like that.

In case you were wondering, “Qap” is Klingon for “The Bee Sting”. Believe it or not, if you go to Google Translate, you can translate words into Klingon.

Cover of the book Dream Our World

For an adventure that needs no translation, pick up a copy of Dream Our World. Inside, my two boys go on an adventure of the imagination in the art museum of their dreams.

Dream Our World is available both from my shop and from Amazon.

Giving Back

No one said it was a rational thought, but it’s what I was wondering as I watched a bat the other night.

Little Cairn terrier.

Let’s call her Edith. Why? ‘Cause she’s such a dingbat!

Cover of the book Dream Our World

Don’t forget to pick up a copy of Dream Our World. You will want to brag to friends that you had your copy before the book becomes fabulously famous Inside, Bitey and Toby visit the museum of their dreams and enjoy a day of unsupervised fun!

Dream Our World is available from my shop and from Amazon.

The New Mug

Bonk!
World's Worst Mom

Don’t worry. Toby is fine. He doesn’t have to go to the vet; I do.

Cairn terrier looks up at the camera.

I don’t need the vet. I’m perfect.

I thought I had a handle on my eye problems, but on Monday my eye swelled up like a Greg Nicotero creation. When Friday came along and I still wasn’t feeling well, I decided to call the doctor. We’ll find out on Monday if I can go back to being me or if I have to move to Georgia to work as an extra on The Walking Dead.

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If you are in or might be visiting New York City, don’t forget to stop by The Museum of the Dog! Help to rebuild NYC while celebrating humankind’s best friend. If you can’t go in person, consider buying a gift from the museum’s gift shop.

Curious what pups might do in a museum geared for dogs? Then pick up a copy of Dream Our World.

Cover of the book Dream Our World

Dream Our World is fun for all ages. It is available from my shop and from Amazon.

Don’t Read This (Paving My Road to Hell)

Jesus rejects supplicants because they are not wearing masks.

Ew!  get away!  You’re not wearing masks!

I told you not to read this.

Church is not for me. My mom loves it, though, and I love my mom, so I sit beside her to keep her company.  In this state, the rule is that if you are outside and more than 6′ away from another person, you don’t have to wear a mask.  Due to logistical issues, churches hold services outside instead of in their buildings.  Parishioners scatter themselves across the grounds and the parking lot.

Some people have decided that even outdoors and 6’+ away from other humans, they still feel at risk.  Rather than moving even further away from their neighbors, they decided to write to the priest who initiated a campaign of mask shaming.  I guess around here we have that super virus that is self-propelled.

This past week, the sermon was about being quiet and listening to hear God.  Of course the “bad guys” in the contemporary examples were young children wearing ear buds.  Somehow the priest failed to notice that there wasn’t a single moment of silence in that service for prayer or meditation.  It was filled entirely with organ music and singing.

Young cairn terrier looking over his shoulder.

I’m a terrier.  I am never quiet!

Before everyone left, the priest told listeners that they should be grateful to the volunteers who gave their time to sanitize, sanitize, sanitize the church.*  Then we were told to go forth in confidence and conquer our fears.  From the dirty looks I got when I laughed out loud, I presumed that wasn’t intended to be funny.

Thanks to the many hours I spend each day in the kitchen, I have plenty of quiet time to try to get in touch with a Higher Power.  Instead of amazing revelations, I find such idle questions as, “What happens to the left-overs after pressing olives for olive oil?” in my head.  (If you are curious,  they are dried in the sun and them compressed into briquettes to be used as heating fuel.)

I may not know God’s plans for me, but I know a teeny bit more about olives.

Actually, we puppies are born perfect. We don't need religion to find God like humans do.

*Not sure why all the sanitizing since the people are on the outside.

Oil painting of Westie puppy.

Oil painting of Westie puppy.

If you would like a pet portrait, order now before I am sent directly to hell!  Details about sizes and pricing – as well as other examples of my work – can be found at my website L Bowman Studios.