To the Victor Go the Spoils

Can I have that?  No, it's spoiled.

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My garden produced very few vegetables this year, but so far it’s grown two rabbits, eight mice and two voles.

If you have the funds, I suggest investing in Victor stocks.

(By the way, you’re welcome that I didn’t provide photos of all the dead critters!)

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You mean I was supposed to be doing something

other than eating tomatoes out here?

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Looking early for Christmas gift ideas? Consider giving the special man in your life a Hand Knit Merino Wool/Tweed/Alpaca Cardigan.

This classically tailored Man’s XL Coffee Brown Tweed Cardigan is comfortable enough to wear on chilly evenings at home yet  handsome enough to wear to work on casual Fridays.  It can even be worn to church or out to dinner. Dressed up or dressed down this hand knit cardigan in Coffee Brown is sure to quickly become a favorite in your man’s wardrobe.

For more information on this Tweed Cardigan and other fine gifts, please visit my shop at L Bowman Studios.

83/63

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Forcing fluids has some interesting side effects like being affected by the gravitational pull of the moon….and being able to keep up with the boys at night.

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How about we start by peeing on this?

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Dream Our World

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We’re a little over a month into the new school year, but there is still time to expand your horizons and increase you knowledge of the art world! Dream Our World provides an opportunity to discuss both classic and modern pieces.

Inside the Museum of the Imagination, Geordie and Toby view the world of art from a canine perspective while enjoying a day of unsupervised fun. There are a lot of hidden gems inside Dream Our World, and it is a joy for all ages. Treat yourself to a read that is both entertaining and educational!

Dream Our World, and other fine gifts, are available from my shop at L Bowman Studios.

5 1/2 Weeks

I apologize if any of you were eating when you opened this. (Eww! Gross old lady legs!)

I use Bitey Dog as sort of a personal journal. This post is for myself so later I can look back and remember what this stupid tick bite was like.

What does it feel like? It is like having a deep tissue bruise on top of a giant mosquito bite. When I’m reclining it feels better. Standing makes it ache. It nearly always itches. Heat makes everything much worse. (Hard to avoid heat in the summer! 😆)

Why don’t I take antihistamines? There are very few antihistamines I can take. When I’ve tried them in the past, they made me sleepy and gave me dry mouth, but they didn’t really affect the allergic reaction.

What about steroids? Topical ones make things worse (increased itching). I don’t know about oral steroids. There are none that I can take because they all contain corn.

Would you get that thing out of my face already?!? I told you how we dogs feel about ticks.

Years ago I was bitten by several spiders. If I remember correctly, it took around eight weeks for the symptoms to fade. It looks like I have close to three weeks more of this to go. ☹️.

I wish I could use my experience to pressure pharma companies to diversify the bases for products. I know I’m not the only person in a situation where we would likely benefit from medication but can’t take it.

A Fine, Fermented Beverage

Tulamore Doo-Doo
A Fine, Fermented Beverage

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We  made it ourselves!

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But Kopi Luwak is OK? You hypocrites disgust me.

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Actually this post was a way for me to get acquainted with a new computer. My old one was 15 years young (not even old enough to drive *sniff*), and I was afraid it would give out on me during tariffs/chip shortage – name your disaster of choice to make prices higher. Of course my old software won’t work on the new system, so I have been experimenting with replacements. What a mess.

Bitey Dog might have a different look since old tools are no longer available. Maybe I’ll take this opportunity to make the boys all Westies so I don’t have to worry about colors anymore.

Don’t you even think about it.

Lightning in a Bottle

I've done it!  I'm going to make a million dollars!

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What have you done, puppy?  You know how lightning free nitrogen atoms which then dissolve in water and rain down to earth as fertilizer?  Yes....

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I've harnessed that energy and trapped it for consumers in this convenient container.  It will make their plants grow lush and green.

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I know you can't have actual lightning in that bottle, so what's really in there?  My pee!

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Now whenever anyone fertilizes their lawn, it will be mine.  Pretty soon every plant on the planet will belong to me, and humans will pay ME to do it!

Ew, nobody is going to want that.

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We can trick people into putting our pee on their lawns?!  How do we get in on that action?

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Now I feel like an idiot for doing it one drop at a time.

I found out recently that there is something called Green Lightning that can create nitrogen for fertilizer using electricity, water and air. The company says it uses about the same amount of energy as a toaster. They claim it can pay for itself in a year. So how much does it cost? First the low down payment of $97.00…then a second payment of $11,500.00 and a final payment of $27,040.00. Easy peasy lemon squeezey! (Guess we’ll have to stick to dog pee.)

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Spare yourself the anxiety worrying over tariffs when dealing with products from other countries. Buy the young man in your life quality Made in America clothing for the next special occasion in his life completely tariff free! (To read more about each item, please follow this link: Boys Department.)

These, and other items for young men, can be found in my shop at L Bowman Studios

I’m Going To Hell

Not my image.

It seems that whenever I am at church they tell us that if our neighbor has something and we wish we had one too, we are going to hell for being covetous. I follow the blog of a very nice lady who is fixing up a small farm to be a beautiful, productive, wonderful home. I am jealous of all the hard work she gets to do there. This past week, my neighbor adopted a little Maltese puppy. He is so cute!! I wish I had a little Maltese puppy too.

It looks like I’ll be heading to hell. Maybe I’ll see you there?

Should I be worried that there’s another cute boy in town?

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Spare yourself the anxiety worrying over tariffs when dealing with products from other countries. Buy the young man in your life quality Made in America clothing for the next special occasion in his life completely tariff free! (To read more about each item, please follow this link: Boys Department.)

These, and other items for young men, can be found in my shop at L Bowman Studios.

Mrs. Le Petomane

Come on, et me in!  No!

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But it's cold outside!  Then warm yourself by the porch light.  Just be sure to avoid open flames!

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Yeah, none of those hobo-fire-barrels for you!!  What's going on here?

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Mom turned out to be one of those rare humans who cannot take collagen supplements.  Oh my gosh, that is too funny.  That's what she's always accusing me of!

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Oops.

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Seriously guys, let us in!  I'm a dog! I'm supposed to do that!

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Let me in. It wasn’t me. I swear!

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OK, seriously, I have this big bottle of collagen that it’s obvious I can’t take. Any suggestions what I can do with it? Can you compost collagen?

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Bear Paw Quilt

Looking for ways to stay warm? Consider this!

This rustic Bear Paw Quilt would fit in nicely at a cabin by the lake or thrown over your couch at home.  The pattern is geometric, and the colors are bold yet earthy.  The overall effect of the quilt is of paw prints in snow.  On sunny days, the colors look so inviting it is hard not to lie down on them and take a nap.

Handmade Bear Paw Quilt and other fine gifts are available from my shop at L Bowman Studios.

Helpful Autumn Life Advice

Don’t eat the grapes below the level of the dog.

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The grapes? I was just looking at them. Honest.

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(Don’t worry. Murphy is always supervised and is not allowed to eat any of the grapes.)

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Dream Our World

Join Bitey and Toby on the adventure of a lifetime with Geordie and Toby in Dream Our World! 

Inside Dream Our World, Bitey Dog (Geordie) and Toby visit the museum of their dreams, view the world or art from a canine perspective and enjoy a day of unsupervised fun.

Dream Our World is back in stock in my shop at L Bowman Studios. Get your copy before I sell out!

Gross Jabba & Doggy Mama

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Hey guys, come take a look at t his! Ewww! That's disgusting!

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Wait, you drew a Jabba the Hutt picture for a hair story? Not a fat joke?

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What? He's bald too.

Sadly those real gobs of hair keep falling out, and I’ve already lost about half of what I started with. I asked the doctor if Lyme’s were responsible for the hair loss since it caused so much pain to my head, but she said it was just the trauma of being sick.

Last night I was glancing over my hospital discharge papers. On them was a note about my blood pressure being HIGH at 144/77. (Normally mine is so low that it is too low.) I Googled whether Lyme’s can cause high blood pressure, and – no surprise- it can. The disease infects every organ and can affect the heart. The article I read said that the tiredness and fatigue that comes with Lyme’s is due largely to how it affects the heart.

Hmm, so if Lyme’s can alter the way the heart works, can it influence the appetite as well? I was curious because I find myself only wanting bland, unseasoned food lately. Off I scurried to Google that as well. While Lyme’s doesn’t cause an aversion to spiced or seasoned food, it can and does upset the GI tract. It can cause this lovely condition called “The Bell’s Palsy of the Bowel” where it can create some wicked bad constipation by weakening the muscles that move food through the intestines. Some people self-medicate for months before realizing that this is the result of Lyme’s and not something else. By the way, there is no reason that I bring this up. No reason at all. However, you may want to buy stock in coconut water and laxatives.

So, there is more than one reason I drew our dear friend Jabba today. I feel as disgusting as he looks.

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Don’t look at me. I’m good at pooping.

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Dream Our World

Come see what my boys have been up to by picking up a copy of Dream Our World. Inside, they visit the museum of their dreams and enjoy a day of unsupervised fun.

Dream Our World is available from my shop at L Bowman Studios as well as Amazon and your local library!