A Haiku

Hey Garbitch. Ha ha. Very funny Rude-y.
Phew. Did something die around here?
I'm just as sick of how smelly this psoriasis is as you are. Says the woman without a dog's nose.
It makes you smell like a dumbster. Don't you mean dumpster? Po-tay-to, po-tah-to.

Warm autumn evening-
bee clouds swarm menacingly
around the dumpster.

Don’t believe these drawings. I’ve been really nice to mommy lately.

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Handmade Butterfly Quilt.
In some parts of the world, the weather is already starting to cool. Be prepared for those chilly nights with a warm, handmade quilt. This twin sized Patchwork Butterfly Quilt is hand appliqued, hand embroidered and hand quilted. (If you’d like, you can tell friends and family you made it yourself in your spare time during the lock down!)

This colorful Patchwork Butterfly Quilt, and many other fine items, are available from my shop at L Bowman Studios.

I Always Thought Sunflowers Were Happy…

Bwaaaah....

…but maybe not this one. It appears she did too much partying over the weekend, and on Monday I found her face down in the spinach.

Ha ha!

Ha Ha!

Her sisters stood over her laughing at how she couldn’t hold her booze.

Ugh, somebody hold my petals!

Can’t wait to get rid of those pukey flowers so I can get back to digging!

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School is back in session! Encourage your young student to combat covid apathy by wearing quality, classic attire instead of the ubiquitous T shirts and shorts/yoga pants. Also suitable for religious services, these handmade silk neckties show that your young person is serious about their future. (I think these days that passes for grammatically correct.)

Boy's Long Sleeved Shirt shown with optional Red Silk Tie

Silk ties and other fine items are available from my shop at L Bowman Studios.

Cotton Balls

What happened to you? Did you lose a fight with a bag of cotton balls?
Actually, that would have been more fun.

Today I got to experience nerve conduction testing. While not as bad as I was expecting, it still wasn’t much fun. Basically they stick needles into your muscles (while insisting that you remain completely relaxed as they do!) then ask you to flex so that they can check how your nerves and muscles are working. Some times they shock you with electricity (probably mostly for amusement). Where they stabbed me in the back, I developed some colorful goose eggs. I take turmeric, which acts as a blood thinner, so I ended up with cotton ball band-aids all over.

The take away? I can add Lou Gehrig’s Disease to my list of things I don’t have.

Another “you” post? This is getting boring.

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Are you heading to a birthday party or shower? Consider using this festive, reusable Zodiac Gift Presentation Bag to present your treasured item! Colorful Zodiac themed bag is made of durable bottom weight cotton and lined with muslin and a stiff interfacing to give it its shape even after being washed. After the gift has been removed, the bag can be reused as a gift bag or repurposed as a tote.

This any many fine items are available from my shop at L Bowman Studios.

Woof, Woof Brown Dog

Woof, Woof Brown Dog

Have you any stool?

Yes sir, yes sir,

Five bags full!

Two for my mother.

Two for my bro

And one for the chippy-munk

who runs to and fro!

Oh dear heavens, where did you come up with the idea for such an awful poem?!?

Terrier looking up at basket of green beans.

Well, it is that time of year again. After a late start, the beans started coming in like crazy. Toby loooves green beans and begged and stole and whined and howled until he was finally full.

I am a very effective howling beggar.

The next day’s “end result” inspired today’s poem. (It’s your own fault for stopping by today!)

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It’s hard to believe it is back to school season already. Some youngsters I know only had one day of class before catching the latest bug going around. Whether it is a virus or allergies, having a reusable handkerchief can save both your nose and the planet!

Ewwww

There are a number of hand painted handkerchiefs at my shop that would make a great gift for yourself or someone you love.

L Bowman Studios

The Dogged Beatles

You know, I believe the Beatles were really dogs. What makes you say that?
So many of their songs are about things that interest us. Like what?
Think about it. There are songs like "Hey Chewed" and Eleanor BigPee". Even "Norwegian Food". (What do you suppose Norwegian food is anyway? Pro'lly fish.) What about "Yellow Submarine"?
Why do you think it was yellow?

Poor Toby needs a hobby.

Don’t go blaming me for this nonsense. You’re the one who’s crazy.

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Dream Our World

What would two puppies do if left on their own in an art museum? Find out in Dream Our World! Inside the boys discover the world of art from a canine perspective and enjoy a day of unsupervised fun.

Dream Our World is available form my shop.

Unremarkable

The MRI says my brian is "unremarkable". We could have told you that.

Yes, once again I had a procedure that told me absolutely nothing about what is going on with me. I suppose I should be happy that this process of elimination is helping me to find the real problem, but this morning when doctor’s office called they pretty much said that after the nerve conduction testing next month, there is nothing more they have to offer. Great. Now I have another month and a half of falling down before going through more testing that will most likely have “inconclusive” results.

Coincidentally the night before the test I watched a bad movie where a running joke was one of the characters trying to break into the recording industry by composing House Music. The music was truly awful but was considered greatly improved when a nearly-dead man in his apartment started tapping a single note over and over on the composer’s keyboard. It turns out that MRI’s sound just like that awful House Music! It was all I could do to keep from laughing as that single repeating note kept being blasted through the tube to the counterpoint of musical sounds the machine made. (If you haven’t had an MRI, they are very musical. They don’t just make the ka-chunk, ka-chunk sound shown in TV medical dramas.)

I have a friend who has been very supportive and keeps encouraging me saying that it’s not that nothing is wrong with me but that the doctors haven’t found anything because they aren’t asking the right questions. In the meantime, my technical diagnosis still remains “bull sh*t lying hypochondriac bit*h”.

Oh my gosh, would you quit yammering about yourself already and tell a story about me?!?

Next time, puppy.

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Could your day use a little magic? If so, consider adding a Royal Pillow to your decor! Available in a variety of colors and sizes, they can add a touch of whimsy to your life.

Royal Pillows, and many other find gifts, are available at my shop at L Bowman Studios.

Toby’s Pig

I once had a pig with no nose. How'd he smell?
Terrible.

And there is your Bad Dad Joke of the day!

Happy Fathers’ Day to all the Papas out there.

What? I didn’t want him telling on me if I tooted.

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Dream Our World

What would two puppies do if left on their own in an art museum? Find out in Dream Our World! Inside the boys discover the world of art from a canine perspective and enjoy a day of unsupervised fun.

Dream Our World is available form my shop.

Mommy’s Tick

Help, I have a tick! It's the worst pain in the entire world! She's doomed!
Don't worry. I'll save you!
That's not what happened. Who is the world going to believe? You or me?

Well, it was my turn to get a tick this week. I foolishly laid down in the grass to stretch my back, and one of those blood-thirsty little suckers got me. Toby said he was glad I finally knew what it felt like to be snacked on by a bug and that I should have much more sympathy for him and that I should give him more Milk Bones to make up for all the suffering he has gone through and the Milk Bone compensation is retroactive to Geordie’s lifetime and it extends to other animals that have ticks too. In other words, many more Milk Bones.

Many, many more Milk Bone

Dig in the Garden

Mom! Mom! Can we go dig in the garden? I'm sorry guys, but I've already started planting. You won't be able to dig out there for a while.
Oh whoa is us! We are the saddest puppies in the whole world! That's not how you spell "woe". Be quiet. We're upset. We never get to have any fun. At all. Ever!
Hey wait, what are you two doing with my shoes? Don't worry about it.

She’s a fool if she thinks she is going to keep me from my dirt!

This is the latest I’ve ever been putting in the garden, but Toby doesn’t appreciate the extra digging time he had. All he sees is that fence between where he is and where he wants to be. Poor evil beastie. He is in for several weeks of disappointment…well, till the beans come in.

Terrier looking up at basket of green beans.

What can I say? I am a sucker for green beans.

It’s Finally Here

Thank you to everyone who gave me suggestions about my prescription!

I did some calling around and found that the pharmacy I had randomly chosen was charging 7x what a neighboring pharmacy was and that is why my claim kept being denied. I called my doctor and asked if she would call the prescription in to the other pharmacy, and she said yes. Within half an hour I got a call back saying that my medication was waiting at the new place and would only cost me $3.00 for a two month supply. Suddenly treatment is no longer “medically unnecessary”. Yay.

The elusive box of medicine.

Maybe now I will be able to get back to a normal life where I don’t have to be afraid of lights or air conditioning. 👍

Thank you again, everyone!

Now that that’s settled, can we go back to talking about me?