Has anyone seen my red shirt?
Not that Geordie is always trying to get rid of Toby or anything…..
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To see what my fellas were up to before they headed to the museum, pick up a copy of Poopiter. Poopiter is an illustrated chronicle of my boys’ first year together.
As you can see, the stories and ideas inside my books often come from real life – including the moon.
We got really lucky this year in that three different types of cicadae are all hatching at the same time. If you live in town, it isn’t so bad, but the further out in the country you are the more likely you are to lose your sanity having to listen to millions of these things serenading each other with their songs of courtship. (A local newspaper told us that we were to expect locusts, but these are obviously not locusts.)
We had a bumper crop of cicadae when Geordie was a puppy, and he loved crunching on the shells. Thankfully Toby doesn’t seem to be interested in them. I don’t think I could hold down my lunch if I had to listen to that again.
Other than sounding like Hollywood UFOs, these oversized insects are doing something terrible which is distracting the local birds away from a very important job…eating the ants that are taking over my garden! The robins are so fat and lazy after gorging on cicadae that they lie around on their backs with their wings on their stomachs whining for Tums.
By the time the cicadae are back underground, I think the ants will have taken over like one of those 1970’s TV disaster movies. (Starring Linda Day George, of course.)
What? You would rather I eat the cicadae?
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Come to a world with no ants and no cicadae! Join Bitey and Toby in Dream Our World as the visit the museum of their dreams.
Inside, the boys imagine themselves into the famous works of art – they have no interest in the lesser known ones – as they explore all that the museum has to offer.
(Honest. It’s really cute. I have found that everyone from little kids to great grandmas enjoy it.)
Despite my best efforts to keep him away from it, Toby picked this little azalea as his favorite peeing spot over the Winter. I can only imagine what his daily waterings did to the plant. As you can see it doesn’t look quite like the other Spring flowers. I am not positive, but I think it heard it murmuring something that sounded like “electric fence“.
I don’t know what you are complaining about. It looks fine to me.
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There is still time to order Poopiter before reading Bitey and Toby’s next book. It will introduce the characters and help to better explain the picture “Peppermint Girl”.
I will be posting a link to the new book later this week!
We bark in the morning.
We bark in the night.
We bark to surprise folks
And cause them a fright.
A squirrel on the railing
Deserves an “Awoo!”
Till our barkers stop working
Our job is not through.
– Bitey Dog
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Bitey and Toby’s next book is close to being done. Hooray! Everyone can be glad that I haven’t posted in a while because I would likely have taken over Bitey’s blog to whine and complain about how I don’t understand formatting and how my word processor is not working. (As you can see, I did not do that today. Bwahahaha!)
Before the next book comes out, you may want to read Poopiter. Poopiter tells of Geordie and Toby’s first year together and how Toby kept trying to kill himself. (He tried again last week. Different toad, though.)
I took my family for a walk.
It was so very long.
When I got home I ate a lot.
It was so very wrong.
Now in my bed I lie and toot
Until the church bells dong.
Birds fly through my noxious cloud
And quickly lose their song.
(Yes, it’s been another Alpo day.)
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On Monday, the boys and I accompanied Grandma to the funeral home to say goodbye to another friend and neighbor we have lost this year. (Well, we haven’t lost them. We know where they are, but we can’t see them from where we’re standing.)
The pups and I waited outside while Grandma went inside to pay her respects. While we were out there, person after person came out of the building and straight over to Geordie and Toby. They had to greet and be greeted. They told me stories of their own beloved pups – both those who had passed and those who had recently joined the family. Every person left with a big smile on his or her face.
Children especially seem cheered and distracted from the grief around them when there is a puppy at the funeral home. Maybe more could consider having therapy dogs on site for those who need the comfort. I know I would want to visit the therapy dog.
We’re puppies. We can fix anything!!
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Not my picture. It is borrowed from another post.
Geordie says:
A friend just posted this picture of a coyote vest. Actually, this particular ensemble has a coyote vest, coyote bristles and a spiked collar. Not only would this protect me from neighborhood coyotes but it would keep Mom from hugging me all the time. Honestly, she is like Pepe Le Pew, and I am poor Penelope. It’s awful!
Anyone want to transfer some kibble to my PayPup account? I’ll pay ya back. Honest. (*cough, cough, hack*)
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Wanna catch up on what Toby and I have been up to before our next book comes out? Then pick up a copy of Poopiter! Poopiter tells the illustrated story of our first year together.
Poopiter is available at Amazon.
To Toby’s great dismay, I have had to put him on a diet for Lent. Geordie’s pickiness over food has given Toby ample opportunities to become roly-poly by eating his brother’s leftovers. The other day I found this going on in the kitchen. In the background, I was pretty sure I could hear Shaggy singing, “It wasn’t me…”
I’m telling you, it was Blue Puppy who ate all the food!
As you can see, Toby clearly blames his little blue puppy for getting into the dishes and then trying to hide the evidence under the rug.
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Last year when my beautiful Geordie was diagnosed with cancer, I was devastated. The vet said my vibrant, active boy had only a few weeks to live so I made it my mission to make him the most spoiled, happiest terrier in all of history.
Geordie has surprised us all by continuing to live a full life despite his illness. I am thrilled to have my puppy with me for far longer than expected. What I hadn’t counted on was just how spoiled a little dog can be when he gets everything he wants.
For the past few weeks, he has been positively insufferable. I have had to cut back on treats and special attention and put him back on the schedule he had before that fateful vet visit. It has been a difficult decision for me because I realize that I may lose him at any moment. What kind of a pet parent am I if I deny my puppy his final wish of Marro Bones? Good or bad, I did it anyway.
Geordie hasn’t given up squawking for treats, but I have noticed that his eyes seem brighter and his tummy isn’t rumbling as much. He even decided to take me for a walk today. It seems like an obvious solution to keep a pet on a strict healthy diet, but it is difficult to do when the pet is getting ready to leave.
Geordie insisted that he have a say on today’s blog:
First, I have to tell on Toby. He went to sleep in my bed, and he didn’t get in trouble at all!!
This evening, Mom took me out to pee. After we came inside, Toby said he had to pee. (Never at the same time, right?) While they were outside, I very kindly helped Mommy open the jar of biscuits in the closet and eat them. You can tell she likes Toby best because I got yelled at and he didn’t even though he was the one who got caught with the lid in his mouth. Harrumph. Why even have biscuits if you are not going to give them to me?!?
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Since Geordie’s cancer diagnosis, I have found it difficult to write about my boys or even draw and post silly pictures of them. Instead I write about Toby and me going to visit the fallen tree. It is my way of coping. We have had some really good days lately, though, and I want to hold onto them here.
On Saturday, Geordie surprised me by waking me up an hour early to tell me that it was sunny and cold out. He was so excited that he wanted to leave for a walk right away. When I told him I needed to get dressed first he stormed off in a huff and threw himself down on the kitchen floor.
After a few minutes for my morning routine, I got the boys dressed in their harnesses, and we headed out. I was totally stunned at how far my little boy was able to go. We wandered for over a mile together as my two marked everything they could reach. I could see a difference in Toby as well. He really loves walking with his brother. The two of them were calm and cooperative. It was a joy to be with them.
The day ended well with two pups who ate heartily and slept soundly. When you have a sick puppy, those simple things are so significant.
While Toby behaved with Geordie nearby on our Saturday walk, he did not do well when he and I were together. It is my fault. In most things he does so well that I don’t train him as often as I should. This evening I decided to try some training like I used to with Geordie.
To start, I grabbed three of Toby’s toys: a puppy, a kitty and a fox. I brought some treats, then I asked him to touch the animal I named. Geordie heard us having fun and came over to join in. Geordie always loved doing tricks like this. He knew so many words and instructions that it was spooky. He and Toby played this game until we ran out of snacks. It was the happiest and most engaged that I have seen Geordie in a long time.
I was so excited about what we’d accomplished that I wanted to play again, but I know you can only teach a pup for a few minutes at a time. I feel bad that I haven’t been doing this more with Geordie over the past year. His diagnosis was hard on me, and I treated him as a delicate little china dog instead of a guy who liked puzzles and games. I hope there is still time to make up for that. I want his memories of this lifetime to be happy ones.
We got off to a rocky start, but we like walking together now.
The Adventures of Bitey Dog 