Toby recently figured out where carrots come from, and I had to quickly harvest the whole crop if I wanted to have any myself.
*
Carrots with Earth chocolate.
(Using the Vibrant Color setting on my camera didn’t change their appearance much at all, did it?)
When I sliced the big carrot into coins, they were as big as the palm of my hand.
Don’t worry, carrots. I’ll get to you next.
*********************************
Come see what my boys are up to when they are not stealing carrots. Inside Dream Our World, Bitey and Toby visit the Museum of the Imagination and view the world of art from a canine perspective. Dream Our World is fun for all ages!
Sadly those real gobs of hair keep falling out, and I’ve already lost about half of what I started with. I asked the doctor if Lyme’s were responsible for the hair loss since it caused so much pain to my head, but she said it was just the trauma of being sick.
Last night I was glancing over my hospital discharge papers. On them was a note about my blood pressure being HIGH at 144/77. (Normally mine is so low that it is too low.) I Googled whether Lyme’s can cause high blood pressure, and – no surprise- it can. The disease infects every organ and can affect the heart. The article I read said that the tiredness and fatigue that comes with Lyme’s is due largely to how it affects the heart.
Hmm, so if Lyme’s can alter the way the heart works, can it influence the appetite as well? I was curious because I find myself only wanting bland, unseasoned food lately. Off I scurried to Google that as well. While Lyme’s doesn’t cause an aversion to spiced or seasoned food, it can and does upset the GI tract. It can cause this lovely condition called “The Bell’s Palsy of the Bowel” where it can create some wicked bad constipation by weakening the muscles that move food through the intestines. Some people self-medicate for months before realizing that this is the result of Lyme’s and not something else. By the way, there is no reason that I bring this up. No reason at all. However, you may want to buy stock in coconut water and laxatives.
So, there is more than one reason I drew our dear friend Jabba today. I feel as disgusting as he looks.
*
Don’t look at me. I’m good at pooping.
*****************************
Come see what my boys have been up to by picking up a copy of Dream Our World. Inside, they visit the museum of their dreams and enjoy a day of unsupervised fun.
Every year I have to have something odd show up in the garden (other than me, of course). This year I got a sunflower that reminds me of Jeff Dunham’s character Peanut.
Since I took this picture, the birds have eaten all of the seeds on this guy’s forehead, but they are leaving the regular-looking sunflowers alone. Maybe they are trying to make him look more like Achmed?
*
Seriously, just pee on that thing, and let’s get back to what is more important.
Me.
*
Come see what trouble my boys can get into Dream Our World. Inside they visit the Museum of the Imagination and view the world of art from a canine perspective all while enjoying a day of unsupervised fun!
I blame my mom for this. I mentioned to her that I could really go for a brownie or a piece of cake but I didn’t think I could open my mouth far enough to bite one. “Oh,” she said, “cakes and brownies smoosh up really easily. Smash, smash, smash and they are ready to eat!” Turns out she was right. Dip them in coffee, and they go down even easier. Sigh. When will I stop listening to my mom?
Huh? Did you say something?
I stopped listening to you a long time ago.
*****************
To find out what more my boys do when they ignore me, pick up a copy of Dream Our World. Inside Bitey and Toby view the world of art from a canine perspective and enjoy a day of unsupervised fun.
Once again, this post is largely for me. I know I am going to want to remember these events, and Bitey Dog serves as my journal. Read only if you need a sleep aid.
*******
Weeks ago I had a bump on my head that brought fever, joint pain, swelling and a bright red insanely itchy rash that eventually covered 13% of my body (but thankfully the redness has faded.). For every one of these symptoms it is recommended that you call your doctor. I tried. I tried for three weeks, but the office refused to give me an appointment. When I called and asked if there were any appointments available that day, they told me to go to a practice 15 miles away- maybe they would take me as a walk in. When I asked if I could schedule an appointment for the next day, I was told to “Call first thing in the morning, bright and early at 8:00 a.m. sharp, and maybe you can get an appointment for that day.” When I asked to schedule for the following day, they said I should “Call first thing in the morning, bright and early at 8:00 a.m. sharp, and maybe you can get an appointment for that day.” On a different occasion I was told to go to the emergency room if I couldn’t breathe. Well, I could obviously breathe: I was talking to them. On another occasion I was told that the rash I had “was likely a granuloma because, you know, you have a history of granuloma on your face.” 🙄
So, I kept soldiering on until last weekend when family was in town. I was trying to socialize, but my facial deformities were so bad that family wanted to know if I were alright. No, actually I wasn’t.
Not only was my face drooping and paralyzed but my tongue was numb, my taste was screwed up, and I could not open or close my mouth. It was so bad that the next day I barged into the doctor’s office without an appointment and demanded to see someone saying that I thought I’d had a stroke. Someone showed up in seconds and said “What are you doing here? You should be at the hospital.” I wanted to know if there were anything that imitated a stroke that I might have. The only thing the doctor could come up with was to ask me if I had any tick bites. No, no tick bites. “Then get to the ER!’
So, off to the ER went Bitey Mom. When I got to the check in, they asked what was wrong, and I told them my doctor thought I’d had a stroke. “Stroke!” they yelled into their walkie-talkies, and I was quickly whisked away. After doing blood tests, pee tests, heart tests, reflex tests and a CAT scan, the ER doctor determined that I hadn’t had a stroke but had Bell’s Palsy and a whopping bad case of TMJ. I was surprised because I had been told I had Bell’s Palsy before, but this felt different enough that I didn’t recognize it.
To my surprise and joy, the ER doc actually listened when I told her about what had been going on with me. She even asked questions. After she told me I had BP, she said she thought it was triggered by a virus and gave me some comically oversized anti-virals.
*
Even horses won’t take these.
Then the doctor asked me if I have any family history with autoimmune diseases and she listened when I said “yes”. (At least four doctors brushed me off when I told them about my family history.). She said that from the symptoms I have been having, it looks like I have lupus. I told her about being tested for MS last year because of how much my symptoms resembled MS. The last doctor I went to said that it looks like what I have is MS but pre-lesion. The ER doc reassured me that I don’t have any lesions.
Shortly after my ER visit I could feel that the Bell’s Palsy was not going to stay on one side. By the end of the day it had encompassed the other side of my face as well.
I feel really self-conscious because I can’t smile. My Resting Bitch Face is somewhere between pained and angry. I tried to engage Toby in some play when I got home from the hospital, but he misunderstood my facial expression (or lack thereof) and growled at me. I make sure to use a super cheerful voice and positive body language when I work with him now.
The Many Faces of Bilateral Neuralgia
I hadn’t realized until my ER visit that the nerves that controls the face and the trigeminal nerves are so close together. I have a lot of swelling in that area of my head that it has affected both. (As well as my ears. I am having hearing problems too.)For a couple weeks now I haven’t been able to close my mouth to chew. I was just swallowing chunks of food, but that led to stomach upset. Eventually I gave up and started pureeing my food. It looks like meal time at the old folks home, but it sure feels good to eat again.
I asked the ER doctor about the awful pain in my head (scalp) that feels like I have been badly beaten as well as the occipital neuralgia, and she told me that is likely due to the lupus. Out of curiosity I looked up how long lupus flares last, and most descriptions say a couple of days. What?! This has been going on over five weeks. I am exhausted because I can’t stand to put my head on a pillow. My neck hurts too much for me to sleep more than three hours. If this is what lupus is like for me, then it is going to be a difficult future.
Next I’m supposed to see a rheumatologist. I made a bunch of calls and ended up with an appointment for Dec 21. Yeah, something tells me that isn’t going to happen. My neighbor is encouraging me to do a televisit to see if I can talk to someone sooner. Evidently I look really bad, and she is worried about me. I’m going to see what I can do about that on Monday.
If you would care to see what devilment my boys get into when I’m not around, pick up a copy of Dream Our World. Inside the boys visit the Museum or the Imagination and view the world of art from a canine perspective all while enjoying a day of unsupervised fun.
In real life I look even worse than in these pictures. My camera seems to want to color correct. I guess “lobster” isn’t deemed an appropriate color for a human.
Mommy says I have to tell everyone that she has never raised a paw to me in real life.
************************
To find out what other mischief Bitey and Toby like to get into, pick up a copy of Dream Our World. Inside they visit the Museum of the Imagination where they view the world of art from a canine perspective and enjoy a day of unsupervised fun.
Unlike Valentine’s Day, where Toby got me a gift more suited to his tastes, for Mothers’ Day he got me a gift I could actually use.
I can still chew on the shirt if I want to.
**************************
Come with Bitey and Toby on a tour of the Museum of the Imagination as they view the world of art from a canine perspective and enjoy a day of unsupervised fun in Dream Our World.
When a new delivery driver started this route, she memorized every home that had a pup and left a Milk Bone on top of each package she delivered. It didn’t take long for all the dogs dog in the neighborhood to recognize the sound of her truck and bark like crazy whenever they heard it.
Toby can hear the engine a half mile away. If we happen to be out for a walk when it is coming, he will plant himself in the middle of the road to wait for his personalized biscuit delivery. He puts on such a performance that sometimes the driver has to stop traffic to give my little monster a Milk Bone. Woe to the dog several houses away that can see my boy eating his treat and yet is too far away to get hers!
And yes, Toby will climb the steps to get to his biscuit if he gets the chance.
What can I say? I am a sucker for Milk Bones.
****************************
Would you like to see what else Bitey and Toby are up to? Then pick up a copy of Dream Our World. Inside the boys visit the Museum of the Imagination and enjoy a day of unsupervised fun.
Against my will, I got to learn something recently.
A couple of weeks ago I failed to duck low enough when walking under some stairs and whacked my head. I bump myself often enough that I quickly forgot about the incident. A few days afterward, I started getting a big lump on my head. Then I developed chills and fever with joint pain, skin pain, muscle pain and what I presume to be tendon pain because there aren’t a lot of muscles in the hands. Just to make things more fun, I got terribly itchy as if I had dipped my head in poison ivy.
The fever came and went for a few days before I felt like it was behind me. With the fever seemingly gone, my head now feels like someone beat on it with a hammer leaving little circles of pain all over it. While we all know our hair moves in some throwback to when it was more efficient at capturing heat and signaling our emotions, we are rarely aware of it. I have been blown away by how much my hair moves in a day. It is an agony every time it does, yet it constantly does so. The swelling, pain and itchy rash have moved down from my scalp to cover my forehead and the left side of my face to my cheekbones.
Initially I thought I had hit my head hard enough to split the scalp and develop an infection, but I don’t believe that is what happened. It looks like more like I am having an autoimmune reaction to an injury.* I think the itchiness and the swelling are Koebner phenomenon where 11% – 75% (Way to narrow down the numbers, scientists!) of lucky psoriasis patients can develop symptoms that resemble psoriasis whenever their skin is injured (mosquito bites, tattoos, acne, etc). With the way I hurt myself, I can’t see this as being good news. Plus, symptoms can take anywhere from as little as 3 days to as much as 20 years to develop. Sure, that will be easy to keep track of. No problem.
In the meantime, the only way I can get through my days is with an ice bag on my head. I haven’t been able to sleep more than 3 hrs a night since this happened because the itching is so bad and it’s too painful to have my head touch a pillow.
I think what hurts the most is that my hair was finally starting to grow back. All the swelling from this trauma is likely to make it fall out again.
I really need to order a chemo hat.
*Funny since my doctor told me explicitly that I do not have an autoimmune disease.
You should have my fur instead. It is glorious!
***********************
If you would like to see what Geordie and Toby do when they aren’t bringing me ducks, check out a copy of Dream Our World. Inside the boys explore the world of art from a canine perspective and enjoy a day of unsupervised fun.
The Adventures of Bitey Dog 