In the spring, I was tidying up the garden when I noticed that one of my strawberry plants had died.

Strawberry bed without chicken wire cover.

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The strawberry bed has a foot high metal wall with chicken wire on top. When I lifted the wire to pull up the dead plant, I found that some stupid b*tch bunny had hopped on top of the chicken wire and clawed and chewed her way into the bed. She dug a hole under one of my unlucky plants and laid her clutch of fur-covered destroyers. When I picked up the plant, I found a huge wad of her hair where the roots should have been and three sleeping vermin underneath.

Evil lagomorphs where strawberry should be.

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I tried to shoo the undersized monsters away to wreak their havoc elsewhere, but they were stubbornly reluctant to leave.

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Voracious cuniculus is trying to blend in with the dirt.

(I’m not gonna eat that strawberry. Honest.)

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Hence the term “harebrained”.

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You can’t see me!

(Oh yes I can.)

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For the rabbit lovers out there, no cottontails were (seriously) harmed in the making of this blog post. (My turnips, peas and strawberries suffered, however!!) I did tell them that if I caught them in the garden again I would make Hasenpfeffer out of them. So far they’ve wisely heeded my warning.

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Murphy putting his terrier stink in the garden to try to keep the pests away.

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Hello? Are there any bunnies in there?