In grade school we had to do a play where characters needed to learn that the greatest gift was not gold or silver but love. I have come to learn that the greatest gift is not love: it’s poop.

Across north America we faced unusually cold temperatures over the Christmas holiday. In this area it was -5 with a windchill of -30 for days. I know other parts of the country had far worse weather (and our hearts go out to you!), but this was the worst that Toby had ever encountered.

My boy was willing to run out and do super-quick #1s, but when it came to #2 he said he could wait. And wait he did…for days and days. By Christmas eve, he was the crankiest puppy I had ever encountered. He had two meltdowns that day, just like a human toddler. He was in such a mood that he decided to start opening presents – any presents – even those not his.

I tried to tell him it was OK if he went inside. I even set out some piddle pads just in case. I told him he could go anywhere he wanted and not be in trouble, but he just looked at me as if I were crazy to even suggest such a thing. Sneakily I kept giving him pumpkin and coconut water, trying to make going so easy that he could get done before his paws froze to the ground.

Finally, late at night as shepherds kept watch and angels sang, Toby finally went #2. Of all the gifts I got for Christmas, I think this was the best.

Silly. Any dog could have told you that poop is the greatest gift.

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In case your taste in gifts doesn’t run toward poo, consider a soft, warm cardigan. Classically styled Tweed Cardigans are comfortable enough to wear on chilly evenings at home yet handsome enough to wear to work or even to religious services. Hand knit of a merino wool/alpaca/Donnegal tweed blend, this extra soft cardigan will wrap you or your loved one in warmth for years to come.

Tweed Cardigans and other fine gifts are available from my shop at L Bowman Studios.