A Haiku

Hey Garbitch. Ha ha. Very funny Rude-y.
Phew. Did something die around here?
I'm just as sick of how smelly this psoriasis is as you are. Says the woman without a dog's nose.
It makes you smell like a dumbster. Don't you mean dumpster? Po-tay-to, po-tah-to.

Warm autumn evening-
bee clouds swarm menacingly
around the dumpster.

Don’t believe these drawings. I’ve been really nice to mommy lately.

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Handmade Butterfly Quilt.
In some parts of the world, the weather is already starting to cool. Be prepared for those chilly nights with a warm, handmade quilt. This twin sized Patchwork Butterfly Quilt is hand appliqued, hand embroidered and hand quilted. (If you’d like, you can tell friends and family you made it yourself in your spare time during the lock down!)

This colorful Patchwork Butterfly Quilt, and many other fine items, are available from my shop at L Bowman Studios.

Fresh Hell

Oh what fresh hell is this? I've read that people can get psoriasis on their nether regions, but I hoped it would never happen to me! I know something that might help with the itching.
This doesn't help at all! Yeah, tell me about it.
Hey, get out of there!
That's not psoriasis. Those are ant bites on your butt. Hmm, now that you mention it, I might have sat on an ant hill when I was working in the garden.
Sheesh. Humans. They'll complain about anything. Yeah, I agree. By the way, do your paws itch?

When I was diagnosed with psoriasis, I never thought of all the places it could show up. Finding out psoriasis can hide where no one can see seemed like a particularly awful fate. Thank heavens this was only a run in with some angry ants.

If you wanted someone to bite your butt, you should have let me know.

I already bite your underwear.

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Are you looking for a unique and personal gift for someone? Then consider a hand painted handkerchief! With summer allergies and sniffly viruses abounding, a reusable cotton hankie could save hundreds of paper tissues over its lifetime.

A variety of hand painted hankies are available from my shop at L Bowman Studios.

Ghost Rider

Great googly-moogly, what happened to you?  Oh come on, it's just psoriasis.  I've had it for a while.  Mommy is Ghost Rider?
So h ow come you haven't drawn yourself like this so far?  Are you kidding?  I get enough grief over my weird eyes and my wonky knees.  I can just imagine what folks would say about this.  Mom!  Mom!  Here's a list of them who done me wrong so you can exact revenge on 'em!
Dogs offer commentary on their mom's condition.
Lemme guess.  Does it involve me wearing a paper bag?  Maybe...?  Where's your motorcycle?  Outside?

You would think that masks would have been my friends this past year, hiding my appearance from inquiring eyes. On the contrary. If you’ve ever wondered what that stuff feels like, it is like one of those horribly painful sunburns where even the softest silk feels like sandpaper against your skin – where simply moving is agony – where you absolutely positively do not want some smart aleck little brother to come along and slap you for the sheer enjoyment of your misery. Trying to wear a raspy mask over psoriasis is actually quite painful.

No, that is too good.  Pull some fibers on this part so Americans' noses itch.  Then they'll  have to scratch and will give themselves the flu.  Mwahaha!

Despite how much this looks exactly like one of my drawings, it is actually borrowed from the internet.

Americans are very polite about something like this. Nobody pointed at me and shouted, “Eww, that’s grody to the max!” In fact, they said nothing. If I brought up my appearance, though, they would jump in with tons of questions and healthy curiosity. Speaking as the resident weirdo, insults aren’t nice, but saying “Hey, what happened?” is perfectly fine. It’s OK to ask questions. The elephant in the room knows it’s there.

Getting to wear my unique gift from God on my face has made things harder when it comes to business. It is difficult to approach people with confidence and try to introduce them to my work. It is also more difficult to get a service sector job where you are the face of a business. While no one will admit that “fugly” is the reason for not hiring you, you will simply find that someone else always gets the job.

Have I tried medical care for dealing with this condition? Yes. The doctor charged me $300 for a 5 min consultation. Her advice? Hydrocortisone. Mmm hmm…Yup, I am definitely in the wrong line of work.

At least Real Life Toby doesn’t care about how I look.

Mom, mostly I look at you from this angle, and all I see is up your broken nose.

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Royal Purple Velvet Pillows are now back in stock! These 10″ pillows would make a wonderful gift for the whimsical child in your life – or the whimsical child inside yourself! Each pillow is trimmed with gold braid and has a silky tassel at each corner. The center is secured by two matching fabric buttons which give the pillow a pleasingly plump look.

These pillows and other fine gifts are available from my shop at L Bowman Studios. All items are made in America and ready to ship.